B&A Trail Marathon....and a reason to suffer

Today I ran the B&A Trail Marathon by Annapolis, Maryland. The trail is constructed on the old WB&A Railroad alignment that operated between 1887 and 1935. I ran the marathon last year for the first time and was so thankful for much nicer weather this time around.

 

Start line for the marathon today

Being able to run locally and not have to travel was such a treat! I was able to sleep in my own bed last night and even sleep in this morning. Okay, maybe sleeping in is stretching it a bit, but I'll take a 4:45 wake up over a 4 any day!

I was on the road by a little after 5 am and the dark roads were deserted. I thought about Stephen. He's the 4 year-old little boy that I was running for. In 2008 his aunt brought him into the Umtha Welanga Health Care Center, as he had tuberculosis. He was also tested for HIV and the results were positive. Sadly, this was not his first tragedy. His mother committed suicide when she learned that she had AIDS. He continues to live with his aunt in a small village outside of Hamburg, South Africa.

It made me think about how privileged I am, not only that I'm able and healthy enough to run these marathons, but just that I'm healthy in general. I've never had to face the crippling effects of a disease like what these children and their parents have had to endure.

I tried to prepare myself for the run ahead. Music helps me rearrange my thoughts and get my mind in the right place. I have a tendency to play the same songs before a race, or at the start of a race to get myself in the right frame of mind. One of those songs is "Suffer" by "The Echoing Green". I listen to it before or near the start of almost every marathon. It really speaks about life on so many different levels. I've listed part of the lyrics below:

"Isn't this world something wonderful
that we were made ot suffer both its honesty and cruelty
today

And our hearts become a sanctuary we are made to suffer
with tenderness and empathy
we were made to suffer"

Marathons are painful (or at least they are for me). Even on my best days, there are moments in the race where there is pain. Whether it's mental or physical, the distance carries it's own punishment. This song reminds me that suffering is part of the process. But it also denotes suffering on a much different depth. It shows the suffering of our hearts, the burden, the pain, the empathy for others. Today my heart has been heavy for Stephen. As I listened to that song I thought of the suffering he has been dealt. My suffering while running dosen't even begin to compare to his life. It makes any pain I experience like a care tossed to the wind when I think about the gravity of his situation. It brings home why I'm doing this, why I'm pushing my body. That thought played over and over in my mind today as I ran, like a song on repeat. It motivated me and pushed me, especially when my body began to feel the physical toll of the miles.

 Heading out toward the trail

And in the midst of all those thoughts and pains, the world around me was magnificant. It was a beautiful day, blue sky and lovely temps. The trail was completely clear of any snow, but mounds of dirty white snow were piled all along on the sides, a slight reminder to earlier winter storms, continuing to melt as the sun shown overhead.

 

So glad the snow was off the trail!

A few miles in to the race I caught sight of the bunny. She had a whole outfit, tutu included and was running happily with all the rest of us. The sight of her made me smile. She was having fun with her day that's for sure!

 The Bunny

The miles passed quickly today. I barely noticed the first 10. I was caught up in thoughts, in the movement, in the rhythm.

After we separated from the half marathoners the trail felt lonely. I remember feeling this way last year too. I continued on, still feeling physically strong and keeping pace. We ran over a couple little bridges and an overpass. The course was mostly flat, with one long hill and several smaller ones in the the later miles of the race.

 The overpass we crossed around mile 18

Around mile 19 we came to a turn around point. I noticed my energy was beginning to drain. By mile 21 the energy had vanished. Like a well, I was dry and parched for something to keep me moving. My legs were heavy and it became a mind over matter (or body in this case) scenario. The last few miles I continually had to fight the urge to walk. I did end up taking several short walking breaks, but only for a few seconds at a time. I refused to finish walking.

 

Heading over a little bridge, near mile 22

Those last few miles were painful and difficult, but I crossed the finish line in 4:04, which was my second best marathon time ever and 6 minutes faster than when I ran it last year. It was suffering with a purpose. I finished for Stephen and I know that this day will make a difference for his suffering. His story will open hearts to the tenderness and empathy that we all must have for those around us in need. I hope it will open your heart.

 

Finishers Medal

Final Race Stats:

My Finish time 4:04:28    9:20/min per mile average

123 of 266 overall
29 of 79 women
4 of 8 in my age group (25-29)