My flight got me there early on Friday and since I had plenty of time to spare, I took my time going through the expo. Jeremy and I had to take separate flights and he wasn't getting in until after midnight. I enjoyed not having to do anything in particular, but just take the day as it came. After the expo I ended up going to a tattoo shop and got the wings that I wanted to add to my "Ithemba" wrist tattoo that I got at the Richmond Marathon. Ithemba means hope and the wings enclosing it were based on the Emily Dickinson poem, "Hope is the thing with feathers. That perches in the soul, and sings the tune--without the words, And never stops at all." For me personally, this entire year has been about hope. It's been about giving hope to the children in South Africa. It's been faith and hope in the trials that I have had to face, physically, emotionally and financially. It's been about inspiring hope in the hearts of others, to find their calling. Because when it all comes down to it, change starts with hope; the hope for something better. Now with my tattoo complete, I was done with my spending. I know a lot of people come to Vegas to take in shows and gamble. I would much rather just walk away with a tattoo. For me it's far more meaningful; it's just the kind of girl I am.
It's entertaining to walk through the casinos and down the strip. For the city that never sleeps, it really is just one huge party. Flashing lights, and the chime of slot machines. There are lots of great places to shop, amazing restaurants and nightclubs to go to. The list goes on and on. But I've seen all that before. What I really "saw" this time in Vegas was something different. If you have never been to "sin city", then let me paint the picture from my eyes. Walking down the strip, you can't cover a single block without seeing them. They tend to be mainly of Mexican decent, wearing shirts with ad info plastered front and back. And in their hands are cards or flyers for girls. They slap the cards to make sound, and extend one to each person that passes, trying to get you to take one. They don't say a word, just slap the cards, and push their hand out. Everyone knows if you're not interested to just ignore them. But even as I walked by, I just couldn't ignore them. I thought to myself, what a waste. These people are just standing on the street for hours and hours handing out cards. I imagine they get minimal pay, and for such a worthless job. This is Vegas, everyone knows that prostitution is legal. If you are looking for that, it's not hard to find. Why do these people have to pass out cards, most of which just end up littering the streets anyway? They could be working, doing something useful. They have more to give. I bet anything, if they had a better job option, they would take it. It made me wish that I could find a way to legislate banning card soliciting on the strip. Give these people a job they can be proud of, that accomplishes something. They deserve better.
The next thing that I saw bothered me as much if not more. I saw dozens of homeless people, sleeping wherever they could, most with cardboard signs asking for help. After my experience of seeing homeless people on the benches while running the Philly Marathon this year I made the decision. I won't pass another homeless person without giving something, if I have anything on me that I can give. I know that a lot of people resist giving, because they worry that the money will be spent on anything but what's really needed. I know that concern has kept me from giving in the past. But I've decided that I would rather give, and take that risk, then to pass by someone who is in need. You never know how you will impact people. And I do believe that kindness can go a long way. These people are used to being ignored. They are used to having people turn their heads away. But I'm not turning my head away anymore. Just acknowledging, and taking a moment out of your day to talk with that person with the cardboard sign may be the only love anyone has shown them in such a long time. To me this is such a simple step, but I am dead serious to follow it through. We have become so conditioned to ignore the things we don't like. Be willing to see hope, and give it!
Best Santa costume!
The Santa run is the largest gathering of Santas and your registration (only $35) includes a 5 piece Santa suit for you to run in. You get to keep the suit, and I can't even begin to tell you how excited my 5 year old son was when I shared that news with him. Every year this event is held to raise funds for charity and it also goes after the world record for the most Santas in one place. To me, it sounded like a real blast! This was a fun run, not for time. And people of all ages and abilities came out to participate, either for the 5k or 1 mile walk. There were small kids in Santa suits, wagons and wheelchairs.
With Jeremy before the run, minus our white beards
People even came with their dogs, many dressed as a canine Santa. Jeremy and I decided to run together, and it was a fantastically beautiful morning when we got to the shopping center to pick up our packets. The event itself lacked a lot of organization, but aside from that, it was fun. They were giving out candy canes, playing Christmas tunes and even the mayor showed up with festive showgirls to show support.
We got together with some of Jeremy's friends from college that lived in the area that afternoon and enjoyed some time away from the strip. Before we knew it, it was getting late, and we still hadn't had dinner. We went to P.F. Changs for some Chinese, but it was an hour long wait. No problem, we'll just hang out in the casino. I put $20 in slots to gamble, and after going down and up, cashed out with $21.00. I decided I wasn't going to let Vegas take any of my money, even if all I walked away with was a $1. That was the extent of my gambling in Vegas. After dinner, we went back to the room to relax. With the race starting at 7am the following morning, I knew that most runners would probably head to bed early. Of course Saturday night is a huge party night, with all the clubs raging way into the early morning hours. I had decided long before I got to Vegas, that I wasn't going to worry about sleep the night before the race. I have run under just about every condition imaginable. So we went out to a club and had fun. I danced and had a couple beers. We left when Jeremy just couldn't stay awake anymore. I was actually feeling great, and if he hadn't wanted to go, I very well might have just stayed up all night. We got into bed at a quarter to 3 and that meant I'd be getting less than 3 hours sleep.
Ready to go out!
Maybe I should have just stayed up. That was the thought running through my head as I tried to pull myself together in the morning. The dark circles under my eyes evidence to the lack of sleep from the past couple days. I moved in slow motion getting ready, and made the walk down to the start line. It was a cool morning, but was looking to warm up nicely. Vegas closes down the strip for the marathon it was weird to see it completely empty. I grabbed a cold double espresso drink on my way out. I really needed the energy, but wondered how it would effect me with the run. I normally have a small cup of coffee if possible before my marathons, but never two shots of espresso! 
Hey look its Elvis...again...
The course took us through semi residential/industrial areas in the form of a loop. I had run the first half well, and now into the second half, I started to struggle. It wasn't a physical thing, but more a mental thing. I kept thinking, "I can just slow down and walk now. I'm tired. I have plenty of time, all I need to do is finish." The other part of me wrestled with the idea of just taking it easy now. Sure I would still finish ahead of the cut off time, but why was it I wanted to take it easy? It wasn't because my legs couldn't take it. It was because my feet hurt like no one's business and I'm sure I was having a caffeine crash. All of which, was due to being out too late last night. It had been my decision to stay out late. And I felt like I needed to pay that price and do the best that I could. I wasn't running this race just to finish, I was running on behalf of Shane, who is orphaned in South Africa. Most of the orphans I have run for this year have been younger children. Shane on the other hand is 21. However, unlike most 21 year old's here in the US, Shane is still in high school. His mother died years ago, he has no idea of the whereabouts of his father, and he has spent the last several years caring for his younger siblings. It's funny in a way that I would run for someone who is 21, as a lot of young people make a trip to Vegas to celebrate turning 21. It's such a different mentality for Shane and his situation. He's lost most of his childhood, forced to have to step in as a parent for his siblings. As a result, he's been unable able to attend school on a regular basis. He doesn't have the carefree party attitude that is the life of Vegas. His is on survival. It's a quick reminder of why this year of marathons has been so important. It's giving Shane hope for a better life.
Shane
Running the second half of the race was super tough for me. It was still mostly flat, but I was exhausted. I fought the temptation to walk almost the entire time. And at mile 18, I had the epiphany that maybe staying out until almost 3 the night before wasn't such a good idea. But I wasn't going to short change what I had set out to do because of my own stupidity. I have been injured this year and there have been times I have had to take races easier, and slower, in order to be able to continue on my journey. While I don't think I've been 100% for a long time, I knew that what was holding me back today was my own cause and effect. And I refused to let that be reason enough to not push. So push I did. One mile at a time, one step at a time.
At mile 22, I slowed down to walk and call Jeremy, letting him know where I was on the course so that hopefully he could see me at the finish. His phone went to voicemail and I left a message about the struggle I was having with wanting to walk. But I also told him I was worried to slow down and walk because I might fall asleep! That's seriously how tired I felt.
Heading into the second half of the race
This is it for pictures of the second half, I was too tired to even take pictures
(plus there wasn't much to take photos of)
It was everything in me to keep going. And the last few miles seemed to drag on forever. As we approached the finish area I felt just awful. I had made sure not to have too many drinks the night before so that that wouldn't be an issue, but everything felt icky. I just kept thinking of Shane, and that kept me on course. I crossed in 4:10, happy to be done, and wanting to collapse. I called Jeremy to try and meet up with him. Apparently he had been mixed up by the fact that the full and half marathoners were separated for the finish line, and he missed seeing me. He was half a mile away from the finish line. Right then and there I was overcome with devastation. I had wanted him to see me finish this race so badly. I had just gutted everything out of myself on the course and I wanted him to walk me back to the hotel. Hearing that he wasn't there really shattered me. It was everything I could do to keep from crying. I started to make my way back toward the hotel and he made his way toward me. When I saw him I just broke out in uncontrollable tears. I don't know why I was so emotional. I think the toll of this year, with this being marathon #50 and how much I had to dig in myself to run that pace, combined with very little sleep the past 2 days, I just fell apart. He held me and I cried. As I have been getting closer to the finish of this year, I have found myself becoming more emotional about the races. But I have never broken down like this. I tried to stop my tears and collect myself, but I just couldn't. We started making our way back, and at one point some woman came up to me to ask me if I was ok. I guess I really wasn't, but I told her I was. Sometimes you just need to cry.
The walk back to the hotel seemed unbearably long. My feet were raw, and my right leg was feeling not right. It felt like an IT band issue. After having had a ton of IT problems with the opposite leg this year, I had a pretty good notion that that was the culprit. As we made our way back, I passed several homeless people. In keeping with my decision, I took the money from my pocket and gave to each person I passed until I had nothing left. It wasn't a ton of money, but it made me feel good to give it.
I have learned so many things from this year. One that really stands out right now is the need to be ever present. Vegas gives you plenty of chances. Sure you can throw your money down on the table, and from there it's really just up to chance. You gotta hope you have a little luck on your side. But the choice to put your money down is there to start with. In the same way, you have to make the choice. Don't go through your days with tunnel vision. I challenge you to choose to open your eyes to what is around you, even if what you see isn't easy to look at. See the things you have neglected to see before. See where you can make a difference, and bring hope. You may not win anything, but what you will gain is unmeasurable.
My medal
"Everything that is done in the world is done by hope" - Martin Luther King Jr.
Final Race Stats:
4:10:58 - finishing time
1,906 out of 5,154 overall
538 out of 2,141 women
94 out of 357 in my age group (25-29)
Love the tatoo!! :) Congratulation on finishing 50 marathons in 1 year, MANY people can not do that in a lifetime! I'm soo impressed about your dedication and willpower. You always finish and never quit! You should be VERY proud of yourself!
ReplyDeleteAwesome race report. I can't imagine running on 3 hours sleep but hey, you had to do Vegas too!
ReplyDeleteCongrats on the race...You did well...
ReplyDeleteI simply like this quote from your blog.
"Everything that is done in the world is done by hope" - Martin Luther King Jr.
Wow, you look great in that red dress...
ReplyDeleteGreat job on 3 hours of sleep! I love the tatoo and so glad your husband was there to comfort you. You're so close to the end....of course it's emotional!
ReplyDelete